While the Department of Homeland Security is busy trying to find any relation between terrorism and groups with conservative principles, like the Tea Party, left wing terrorists keep popping up. The latest is Floyd Lee Corkins II who tried to commit mass murder at the Family Research Council’s DC headquarters.
“I don’t like your politics!” Corkins proclaimed. He then proceeded to draw out a 9mm Sig Sauer pistol. A security guard stopped him before he could carry out his plans to kill. Corkins beef? He is one of those loony liberals who think that marriage should be redefined to incorporate homosexuals and, what’s more, that government should levy its heavy hand to make such an oxymoron so.
It sure is funny that a liberal would act this way. You know, considering that DC, at the behest of liberals, has some of the nation’s toughest gun control laws. Corkins once again proves several tried and true adages. First of all, that liberals don’t think the laws they want for everyone else should apply to them. Second of all, that when you attempt to disarm law abiding citizen, only liberals (criminals) like Corkins will have guns. Like a good little liberal in the mold of left wing idols such as Hitler and Stalin, he apparently wasn’t afraid to kill those that disagreed with him.
But, and this is the kicker, Corkins did something even dumber than expose these truths. On his person, get this, he carried fifteen Chick-fil-A sandwiches. Apparently he was so outraged at the company’s stance in support of traditional marriage and Christian values that he went right out and patronized them!
Yeah, only a liberal would buy a product from a company that they so revile and make them even more profitable. Only a wacked out liberal would do so fifteen times!
What’s a Chick-fil-A sandwich typically cost? $4? This moronic liberal, sorry for the redundancy, added $60 to Chick-fil-A’s bottom line!
You know what? I think all you liberals should protest this way. No, seriously!
All you hard core leftists who are seething that people will not bend to your demands for homosexual marriage to be accepted should go out right now and buy fifteen Chick-fil-A sandwiches. Do whatever you want with them. Toss them into San Francisco Bay. Stomp on them. Make sweet love to them. Heck, burn them in a big pile for all I care! Just follow Corkins’ example and go out and buy fifteen Chick-fil-A sandwiches each.
By my guess, there are about ten million really uber, hard core leftists in America. I’m talking about those left wingers that are not so lazy that they can actually be bothered to get off the couch and let everyone know how utterly ignorant they really are. Go forth you crazy liberals! Buy Chick-fil-A and protest them! You idiots.
Ten million times fifteen times $4 is $600 million. That would go a long way to helping Chick-fil-A becoming even more successful.
Now, I know what you are thinking. Why tell liberals how by them buying Chick-fil-A sandwiches to protest the company actually helps the company and is stupid? Look, you are giving liberals too much credit. You think they are smart enough to understand it even after it is spelled out for them.
They’re not that smart. That’s why they are liberals.
Now, as I was saying, go forth liberals everywhere and protest Chick-fil-A by buying their product!
Copyright ©2012 J.J. Jackson