What’s The Biggest Jewel In Your Crown?

As some of you may recall, I wrote an article last week entitled 'In Search of Contentment.' We explored the difference between want and need. I used a line from one of Mick Jagger’s songs. “You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometime you'll find you get what you need.” 

I also referred to a movie entitled The Greatest Showman. The opening song, the name of the film, promises the show is “it’s everything you ever want, everything you ever need, and it’s here right in front of you, this is where you want to be.” Notice the words, want and need. This article completes the thoughts that I started last week.

For most people today, contentment seems to be most elusive. It's like a greased pig. Just when you think you have caught the pig, it squirts right out of your arms. It seems like the more we have, the more we want. External wealth often gives rise to internal craving, and thus the cycle repeats itself. Why? The next ‘want’ is where you want to be. There will never be enough. Constant craving for what is not robs us of the ability to enjoy and celebrate what is. In the words of Shakespeare, “striving to better, often we mar what’s well.” Hint: You learn a lot from people when they don’t get what they want. 

My now-deceased friend, author, and pastor Phil Baker, talks very frankly about ‘wanting your wants when you really need your needs.’ The quote below is from his book, Secrets of Super Achievers.

“To be honest, for our generation, there is more to have, much more. Jesus pointed out that real life does not consist in the abundance of possessions, yet surely this is not true for us. Magazines such as The Robb Report or Gourmet Traveler devote themselves to showing us what is available, and that we would be more fulfilled and contented if only we had ________. (you fill in the blank) The only trouble is that, after the Lear Jets and the limousines, the if only remains.”

You don’t believe him? Look at what those who you think have everything they ever want. After his Wimbledon victory, Boris Becker surprised the world by admitting his great struggle with suicide. Jack Higgins, the renowned author of The Eagle Has Landed, said that the one thing he knows now, at this high point in his career, is that he wishes he had known as a small boy this: When you get to the top, there’s nothing there. 

Lee Iacocca, the former chairman of Chrysler, said, “Here I am in the twilight years of my life, still wondering what it’s all about. I can tell you this: fame and fortune are for the birds.” Iacocca goes on to explain that for him, it was only family and close friends that brought the contentment that he so deeply desired. Making more money does not increase happiness. Ultimately, what we consider superior often proves to be disappointing. 

Thomas Ludwig, together with David Myers, studying the money-happiness question, revealed how we create our own discontent when we describe our inability to buy everything as poverty. Such “poor talk” (grumbling about the price of milk and bread on the way to and from the store in our new four-wheel drive SUV) is highly objectionable. We need to be more honest and admit that when spending outstrips income, the problem is a lack of discipline or priorities, not that we are unable to afford life’s necessities.

Ludwig and Myers go on to say that such talk is not only offensive to those who are truly poor, but also pollutes our thinking and magnifies our discontent. We begin to believe our own propaganda and reduce ourselves to self-pitying victims, whining about what two-thirds of the world's population would rejoice over.

We need to change our vocabulary, as Myers writes: “I need that” can become “I want that.” “I am underpaid” can become “I spend more than I make.” And that most familiar middle-class lament, “We can’t afford that,” can become, more truthfully, “We choose to spend our money on other things.” Usually, we could afford it if we made it our top priority; we have other priorities on which we choose to spend our limited incomes.

So, what’s the secret of the pursuit of contentment? Phil Baker enlightens us: “It’s in understanding that most people have their contentment tied to what they have or lack thereof, and what they earn. Yet study after study reveals that satisfaction isn’t so much getting what you want, but wanting what you have.” Addressing the subject of contentment is especially important because 74% of the world's wealthy people are entrepreneurs, and these individuals tend to be ‘status-fried’ but not truly satisfied.       

Make contentment your priority, not fame, fortune, or frolic. Real success is seeking first the Kingdom of God, which is righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit, which is contentment. God supplies all your needs, not always your ‘greeds’ or wants. Jesus came to give us life and life abundantly. The word for life in the original language is “Zoe.” It means life as God has life. That’s more than money or anything else on this earth. It’s inward contentment. (See Philippians 4:11-13)

Is it well with your soul? If not, contentment is everything you ever want, everything you need, and it’s here in front of you; this is where you want to be. From now on, make contentment your priority. It’s the biggest jewel in your crown.