Pennsylvania Rep. Mike Doyle Comes Out Of His Shell

If you have never heard of Rep. Mike Doyle (D-PA), you would not be alone. He is the sort of guy that does not run out in front of the microphones to give his opinion on much of anything. He also rarely crafts legislation of any sort of pressing importance. For example, right now Mr. Doyle has two pieces of legislation pending in Congress. The first is the “Pet Safety and Protection Act of 2011.” I know, the economy is in shambles; President Obama is fiddling while America burns, citizens are sucking down their ninety-nine weeks of unemployment and Mr. Doyle’s focus is on “pet safety”. Do not try to understand him. You never will. And do not try to understand the thinking of the forty-four co-sponsors of this legislation either considering it is so extra-constitutional that only a nut job would even nibble at it much less bite.

The second piece of legislation Mr. Doyle has pending is an amendment to H.R. 910, “Energy Tax Prevention Act of 2011.” This amendment is entitled, get this mouthful, “Amendment sought to include a study to determine whether regulations of the Environmental Protection Agency under the Clean Air Act to address climate change, if not repealed or otherwise made unauthorized by section 2 of the bill, would cause greenhouse gas leakage and reduce the international competitiveness of United States producers of energy-intensive products.” This, by the way, has no co-sponsors.

But Mr. Doyle, who sadly is my Representative, is reliably one thing if not a leading light in terms of doing things of unimportance. He is a lap dog for the Democratic Party’s leadership in the House. When Nancy Pelosi says jump, Mr. Doyle not only asks how high but also how often, on how many legs and if there is specifically any time of the day she wants him to jump.

Anyone that has lived in Pennsylvania’s 14th Congressional District, and who is not a fool, knows that there is good reason why Mr. Doyle shuns the limelight. This is because whenever he speaks he invariably says something so stupid, so indefensible, that it makes the incoherent babblings of the infamous Alan Grayson (D-FL) look like reasoned debate or President Obama’s campaign of “hope” and “change” seem like a solid platform.

This week we were once again treated to in intellectual vacancy of Representative Doyle. In a closed door meeting with Vice-President Gaffe Machine, uh sorry, I mean Joe Biden, he referred to those in Congress trying to set America’s fiscal house in order as “terrorists.” He then jabbered something about how these people were making it impossible for Congress to spend money.

That is hilarious. But it is not unexpected coming from a man who does not have to worry much about being reelected. His district, a sprawled cobbling together of some of the worst neighborhoods in the Greater Pittsburgh area, is about 70% Democrat in registration. In the 2010 campaign cycle Doyle won reelection with 69% of the vote. His competition was Melissa Haluszcak, a Republican candidate whose campaign consisted mostly of putting up yard signs and hiding from interview and comment requests.

So unless redistricting this year severely changes this district, Mike Doyle knows he has little to fear. He knows that no one of any importance will hold him accountable for stupid comments about things he knows nothing about. He knows that the average voter in this district will never have even heard about his claims that rival the stupidest things ever said. What's worse? Well, most of those here who have heard these comments probably agree with his sentiments.

But the reality? It is Mr. Doyle himself that is the terrorist. Yes, indeed it is true. For a terrorist is someone that partakes in the act of terrorism which is defined as “the systematic use of terror especially as a means of coercion” (Miriam-Webster Dictionary). Mr. Doyle does this simply by being who he is.

His politics have left the whole of America, from individual citizens to corporations to the financial markets, shaky and terrified. All are uncertain of what is coming next. He has tried for years to coerce Americans towards unconstitutional government through this terror campaign in which he supported TARP, Obama’s Stimulus plan, Obamacare and many other stupid ideas that have heaped upon the country so much in the way of bad policy that people like Hugo Chavez are jealous of him.

Yes, it is indeed true. Mr. Doyle is a terrorist trying to blow up America. And like all terrorists he must be defeated or at the very least marginalized into irrelevancy because too many stupid people rush to the polls every election to vote for him in one pathetic district here in Pennsylvania.

I wish Mike Doyle would open his mouth more often. It is so much fun to hear from him and make sure everyone knows just how pathetic this man, this terrorist, really is.