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Obama Bless America

March 3, 2008

Wanted: Millions of adoring fans to follow presidential candidate to the end of the Earth and do whatever he says. Must be willing to obey without question and applaud at the drop of a hat. To apply contact the Barack Obama Campaign.

In a nutshell that is what the Obama Campaign is asking for and, by all indications, getting in terms of followers. And no, I'm not exaggerating.

Recently it has come to light that there seems to be a rash of people fainting in the presence of Obama at his rallies. This is something that often happens when people become so excited that they just can no longer take it. Maybe this is nothing to get too concerned about on its own, but when you couple this with many other bizarre occurrences, you get the impression of being at a religious revival at some mega church rather than a political event whenever Barack Obama is in the house.

When Barack Obama announced recently that he was going to simply blow his nose, the crowd went wild. Why? Is it because he had never been able to successfully do so before? Had all his previous attempts ended in embarrassing miscues? Like him placing the handkerchief to various other parts of his body only to result in mucus being blown all about? Were they happy that he finally got it right?

No. They were just excited to be in the presence of Barack Obama and will cheer at almost anything he says or does. Next week he will probably announce that he has to take a potty break and the crowd will go equally nuts over the announcement.

The only thing missing from the nose blowing incident was throngs of adoring followers rushing the stage in order to claim his discarded snot rag and wipe it on their face to bask in his glory. Perhaps even a claim of miraculous healing that resulted from touching his bodily fluids would have been a nice touch.

At these events you have people dangling perilously over railings and crying out about their love for Barack Obama. You have people crushing themselves upon barricades just to try and get close enough to touch him or even get a whiff of his cologne.

I thought we were electing a President and not the next American Idol. Heck, I wish it was only something akin to a silly television reality show. It's looking more and more like we are preparing to elect the next messiah. Are messiah's elected?

As the crowds of loyal followers continue to gather at his campaign events we are left with a growing impression that Barack Obama is not so much a man but a divine savior in the eyes of the masses. Or perhaps more accurately he could be described as the anti-Christ when you consider that his populist rhetoric breaks very important Commandments of the Christian faith such as not coveting what others have and not taking it from them without it being given to you. That's all right though, because you will just be asked to keep believing that government confiscation under threat of force should you dissent is not really theft.

All this however is of minor concern for the crowds of adoring fans that gather around Barack Obama wherever he goes. They just want to bask in his glory. George Clooney said of Obama that, "you want to follow him somewhere, anywhere," which makes you wonder if Barack Obama said, "Hey George, jump off a bridge to prove your faith in me," would he?

Halle Berry said the same thing. "I'll do whatever he says to do," She said even throwing out something that she would do specifically. "I'll collect paper cups off the ground to make his pathway clear," Ms. Berry gushed. Would she also place rose pedals on the ground so that his pure feet may not touch the dirt?

I hope that there are some things that she will not do for Obama. But then again she is from Hollywood. Do these Hollywood yummy brains ever really think about what they are saying and how silly they sound?

The whole thing is all so very eerie. You almost expect to some time soon hear God Bless America rewritten as Obama Bless America and sung at these congregations. Maybe something like this:

Obama Bless America
Man that we love!
Stand beside us, and guide us
To Paradise with your light from above!
With Free Health Care,
And change for change sake,
Tax the vile rich,
And heal our souls!
Obama Bless America
He'll bring us hope!
Obama Bless America
Our sa-av-iour!
Sometimes I really, really, really wish I was making this sort of stuff up.

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Copyright ©2008 J.J. Jackson

J.J. Jackson is a libertarian conservative author from Pittsburgh, PA who has been writing and promoting individual liberty since 1993 and is President of Land of the Free Studios, Inc. He is the Pittsburgh Conservative Examiner for Examiner.com. He is also the owner of The Right Things - Conservative T-shirts & Gifts. His weekly commentary along with exclusives not available anywhere else can be found at Liberty Reborn.