Flatten the Carbon Curve

Just when Americans are beginning to see a sliver of light at the end of the coronavirus tunnel – just as some businesses are coming back online and the authoritarian Governors can see a bit of power and control slipping away, an old stalwart crisis is waiting in the wings. But there’s a refreshing new take on this aging crisis. 

I’m talking about one of the left’s go-to crises. 

No, it’s not racism. It’s not social justice. It’s not gender inequality, or income inequality. Sorry – I forgot how many go-to crises the left has. 

Yes, I’m talking about Climate Change. 

But how do you make such a tired old crisis like Climate Change seem new? I mean, it’s been around for several decades now. There’s nothing new about it. The “experts” haven’t discovered anything new or Earth-shattering. The climate is just chugging along as it always has. It cools off and warms up at relatively regular intervals, just as it has for centuries. 

So really the only thing you can do is change the name once again, or maybe add something that sounds hip and fresh. Something we’ve, as yet, not equated to the climate. 

And then along comes a new, or novel, virus – the coronavirus. It sucks up all the air in the room. No other story or crisis stands a chance against it. It captures every headline. Suddenly no one seems to even care about climate change. 

Well that simply won’t do. There must be a way to capitalize on this – to get climate change back in the news. Could it be that climate change caused the virus? 

Nah – not even the nuttiest leftists are suggesting that. 

What will the warming weenies do? 

And then someone had a genius idea to tie our current life and death crisis, COVID-19, with our old friend Climate Change. 

Everyone has been talking about how nothing can truly be repaired until we flatten the curve of coronavirus infections. Heck – most people don’t even know what it means, but who cares. It sounds really important. 

Why can’t we say the same thing about climate change? We can’t make any progress on climate change until we flatten the “Carbon” curve. And better yet, we can tie the two together. 

What’s that mean? I don’t know, but it sounds serious and scientific. 

The first articles I could find that mentioned flattening the carbon curve were February 2020 – two to be exact. However, when I read the articles, I noticed there’s no mention of “flattening the curve,” or even that there is such a thing as a carbon curve. So I deduced that someone, or group of someones, went back and changed the titles of the articles to make them pop – to make it sound like it is some new discovery of how to combat global warming. 

Then beginning in late March and increasing rapidly by the end of April, and now into May, hundreds of “science” articles began popping up – as if in lock-step – mentioning flattening the carbon curve. Many just suggest matter-of-factly that “while we’re flattening the COVID-19 curve, why don’t we just go ahead and flatten the carbon curve.

And son-of-a-gun, it appears to be working! 

Yale Climate Connections reports that, “There’s a widely reported direct relationship between the onset of this plague and the glimmer of good news concerning another global crisis also gathering force, climate change: The widespread stay-at-home practices that have slowed the virus have also led to a clearing of the air. Slowed vehicle, airplane, and ship traffic and decreased factory production have led to drops in air and water pollution worldwide.” 

Enviro-weenies are rejoicing that, due to the mandatory house-arrest of citizens because of COVID-19, “the International Energy Agency, IEA, has just forecast that carbon dioxide emissions emitted from the world’s smokestacks and tailpipes are projected to plunge by 8% this year. IEA predicts that the pandemic will remove 10 years of emissions growth practically in the blink of an eye, a drop bigger than at any point since World War II. 

Hooray for coronavirus! 

Does this mean that the carbon curve is flattening and that this, “pandemic-related” reduction will actually slow climate change?” 

Yale says sadly no. What – you were expecting a happy ending from this bunch? 

After this latest pandemic passes, we’ll get right back to killing the planet. But at least now, they have a proven blueprint for saving Mother Earth. 

Destroy the economy. Ruin businesses and lives – flatten that pesky Carbon Curve.